I'm in an all-day training session with Chip Heath and about 70 other people at Willow Creek. Chip and his brother Dan are brilliant thinkers who apply their research to life: business, church, personal.
Here are some rough notes from session 1:
- We are willing to change. We do it a lot.
- We willingly marry; have kids… voluntarily embracing change. Major change.
- These changes seem easy to accept… however, others are very difficult.
- We experience the schizophrenia of change. We want to… we don't want to. We will, but we won't.
- Analytical vs. emotional self
- Part of us wants to get up on a Saturday morning to get a task done… another part wants to sleep in
- Consider these juxtapositions; the last of these is the primary image for today's focus:
-
Analytical
Emotional
Reflective
Unconscious
Charioteer
Unruly horse
Superego
Id
Planner
Doer
Rider: sometimes causes us to regret, press too hard, to long, etc...
Elephant : sometimes steers us away from our intention; but also asks important questions: What if…? That's wrong!
- Consider a rider on an elephant. The rider may know where he wants to go, but the elephant in largely in charge. How do you get those two in sync? That's the challenge of change.
- If we spend time staring at cookies and not eating; restraining from honking; etc… it saps our will power. And when our will power is low, we more quickly give in to other temptations. [Ministries that focus on 'staying away from porn'; 'quitting smoking'; etc… often only strain and drain the self will. Sounds like Romans 7.]
- Must direct the rider.
Who, by the way over-plans, over-analyzes, other-things
- Find the bright spots.
- How many novels/movies merely celebrate a successful marriage? Few if any. We love the conflict, the struggle, to create the story. We are not accustomed to this search.
- What will we change to? That’s a challenge at the onset.
- So, when find the bright spots, don't analyze them or dismiss them. Celebrate them. Own them.
- Script the critical moves.
- People may not be resisting change; they may have no idea how to change.
- Limit the number of options. Or people won't choose.
- Be specific. Abstract directives aren't helpful:
- Be nicer.
- Play better in the sandbox.
- Be a good Christian.
- Point to the destination.
- Change is much easier when you know where you're headed.
- Specific outcomes must motivate.
